Poignant words. It is beyond good to be back home after 18 days away. Saturday morning in China began twenty-six hours in airports or on airplanes, going through Customs at least twice, Immigration at least twice, and picking up our checked luggage and re-checking it twice. Exhausting, but by the grace of God, manageable. Our longest flight was 12.5 hours, and we could not have hoped it would go as well as it did! Kalli played with her seatbelt for at least an hour, and then proceeded to slowly and methodically rip every page out of a magazine for another hour! Oliver sat or slept in his seat the majority of the time, which is a miracle with his energy, and did not have a single temper tantrum on the planes. Thank you God!
We arrived at midnight and stayed awake until 2 a.m. Sunday! Who gave my children Miracle Grow while we were gone?! Everyone was full of excitement and curiosity as introductions of new siblings were made and a quick home tour was conducted. Oliver hugged everyone! He excitedly searched out his brother "Feddy", whom he had asked for every single time we were able to Skype from China. Since, he has forgotten his interest in his brother and been stuck-like-glue to Myley!
Note to Adoptive Families: Oliver loved seeing his photos up in our house as if he had always been there. Do this!
Kalli was shy and reserved at first, but has quickly found the delight in having so many playmates who want to give her their full attention. Freddy received the great honor of being the first in our family to receive a kiss from her. An unprompted one, I might add. Jon received his first Kalli kisses yesterday, Grace did today, and Momma still waits . . .
But that's okay. Most everything aside from sleep is going smoothly. Granted we are in the space known as the "honeymoon phase" in the adoption world. Enamored and in awe of their new brothers and sisters, no one is squabbling. Yet. I'm an optimist at heart, but not naïve enough to think this peaceful co-existence will last forever, lol! I do believe it gives them a good start at bonding. They are super cuteness together! Jon snapped this photo today of our little stair steps - 2, 3, 4, 5, and 9. We love that they are bundled up in unique packages with distinctly different personalities! God has given them all gifts and traits that we love and treasure, and it's such a blessing to see how He cultivates them as they grow.
Sleep struggles abound, and it seems to be getting worse. Two to four hours of sleep in 24 hour periods = not good. The times when I start to nod off, but am awakened every 15 to 20 minutes, seem like torture. When you are in the middle of exhaustion piling up for days and are tempted with sleep, then denied it repeatedly, the feeling is wretched. I am pretty sure they use that as a torture tactic on prisoners of war. It's gotten to the point where I just cry out of total exhaustion, and I feel like I'm going to start puking at some point and not be able to stop. Seems so wimpy and weak to admit when I see it typed, but being in the middle of these moments and actually experiencing them, well, the feelings are what they are. I know many people go through similar ordeals when a new baby is born, or even working night shifts, and just dealing with insomnia. I have been wearing the same shirt for two days, cannot remember if I brushed my teeth yesterday, and quite frankly, I could care less. I just want sleep!!
From infancy to 18 years, I lived in the same house and had the same bedroom. Every now and then, I wake up thinking I am in my childhood room. As my mind clears through the fog of confusion, realizing which direction is which and where I am, it is so disorienting. I wonder if that is how little Kalli is feeling. After the first night home, she wakes up often during the night, wimpering or wailing in her half-asleep, half-awake state. I wonder what her little mind thinks of all these changes. I wonder how her little heart deals with all the fear and uncertainty. All we can do is pray God will give her a sense of security, and inner peace that her world is finally as it should be.
Oliver actually seems unphased, sleeping soundly through the night and naps. He is indiscriminately friendly, meaning he has never met a stranger! It's something we actually have to be cautious about, because it is harder to closely bond with someone who can be happy with anyone. We noticed with our guides in China, and when people stop by here at home, he almost always wants to leave with them. We are working diligently to teach him that he stays with Mommy and Daddy now, because we are a family. I hope it's not too much to ask for continued prayers for our newly formed family.
That's the recap. Actually, I was only able to write this because of the sleep deprivation, so at least I got something accomplished during this "honeymoon"!
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