So Much More Than a T-shirt

T-shirts are likely the first fundraiser that comes to every adoptive families minds!  We have created a design for each of our adoption processes, and they are individually personal and precious to us because they are a memento of each journey. 

Tees are also about spreading awareness.  A fellow adoptive momma purchased one of our "Jesus Hears the Orphan, So Do I" tees, and it led to a beautiful revelation in the doctor's office!  She shares her experience here:

Just wanting to let you know that your t-shirt sparked a conversation today and helped change a heart!  We were getting medical updates for our home study.  The male nurse was asking me what was needed for adoption, and asked if this was my first child.  I told him I have 3 children, 2 biological and 1 adopted, and this adoption will bring home my 4th.  He questioned my pregnancies for the form, then said, "You chose to adopt even though you could have had more of your own."  It stumped him.  He said his fiancé has said the same thing, but he doesn't understand. Then he READ MY SHIRT!  And said now I get it!!!! Today gave him a different perspective.

This momma's story, combined with the questions he was asking and a message on her shirt, made a young man realize adoption is not solely about having children.  It's about understanding there are millions of children without families who deserve one of their own!  It's about understanding every child is precious to our heavenly Father, and He has given all of us the responsibility of caring for them so they are orphaned no more.  So much more than just a shirt!

The Divine Appointment

It started on a snowy morning in the middle of January.  The girls and I were accompanying Jon on a four-hour drive to see his podiatrist post-op, and we had made this trek many times.  For some reason, the county departments had not been able to salt the roads.  Within 2 miles of our driveway, we saw three wrecked vehicles.  By the time we arrived in the tiny city normally less than 10 minutes from our house, cars were at a stand-still.  After an hour of waiting had passed, we learned a semi had jack-knifed and was blocking the entire highway. 

Multiple times during our wait, we contemplated turning around and going back home.  But coordinating work, school, and caregivers schedules had already been attacked and accomplished.  Plus, there was an important errand we needed to run along our way.  We decided to persevere, bypass the gridlock, and take a back road.  I was driving, and began to fret a bit as we got off the main highway and immediately saw three more wrecked vehicles!

I don't know how many back-road miles I drove, but they were full of wracking nerves and slips and slides.  The oldest girls thought it was a delightful little roller coaster.  :)  Finally, we made it safely to the first major city near our home.  What normally takes us 20 minutes had taken TWO hours!  While the roads were clear from there, it was impossible to reach the doctor's office in time for Jon's appointment.  In addition, the likelihood of getting another appointment on the same day with this "doctor in high demand" was slim.  But we called, they were compassionate, and worked us in later in the afternoon.

Everything had seemed against us, yet we arrived in that office at precisely the time God would have us be there.  We just didn't know it yet. 

I was busy keeping the girls entertained in the waiting room, when I heard another momma ask where Kalli was from.  When Jon said "China", her face lit up and she shared a beautiful family photo with us.  Turns out, she and her hubby have two biological daughters and two daughters born in China!  We struck up a conversation, sharing experiences and talking about future adoptions.  Then we discovered we were both members of the same facebook group!  (It was the very group where we first saw Samantha's little face.) 

After leaving the office, we connected officially on facebook, and had a message from this momma.  She read our blog and learned about our fundraising efforts, and her family wanted five of our fundraiser tees.  When I saw their Paypal payment for the tees, I was in SHOCK!  $500!!!!  This sweet family we met 4 hours from our home (they had driven 2+ hours themselves), at a time hours later than we had planned, was part of a beautiful orchestration of God's provision.  This is a family who not only chooses to do something amazing with the money He has given them by becoming adoptive parents themselves, but also by BLESSING other families as well!!  We are still speechless.

Every step of this adoption journey has been miraculous.  From finding our daughter, to seeing God provide EXACTLY what we needed financially.  There have been several donations received in the mail - without us even asking - that arrived right before an adoption bill was due.  Generous strangers reaching out when they certainly did not have to.  Friends met through incredible circumstances sending sacrificial blessings our way.  Loyal family, church family, and friends who have been with us in past adoptions, and still stand by our side trying to help in whatever ways they can.  New friends seeking out ways to fundraise for us.

Do you see the beauty in the connections that are made?  God stirs the heart of someone to pray.  The heart of another is then moved to help or give in some manner.  It's a continuous circle, connecting us and leading us back to glorifying our God. 

All these precious pieces, coming together one-on-one, but most certainly not by chance.  It's all by divine appointment.

Introducing a Daughter, a Message, and Some Cool Tshirts :)

As soon as we knew we were hitting the adoption trail again, we designed a tee for a fundraiser.  (Actually, we are offering two designs, so scroll all the way down to see both.)  The way this design is intricately interwoven with the life of our future daughter is incredibly cool.  Read on.  I'll keep it short, but it is powerful.

Here is the design.  Its message comes from Exodus 22:23 where God tells us that when orphans and widows cry out in distress, He hears them!  God cares for the fatherless, and so do we.

 

Now comes the powerful part.  As we began looking at files of children waiting in China's Special Needs program, we found our daughter.  She is 9 years old and has cerebral palsy that affects her walk.  Children who have been in an orphanage this long know why people come around and take their pictures and measurements.  They know it is an "update" to their adoption file.  The last time folks came around to take this sweet young lady's photos, which was shortly before God brought her file to us, she began crying.  She said:

"No one is ever going to want me."

 

Too many updates.

 

Too many other children in her orphanage leaving with their adoptive families.

 

Too many years of waiting.  Her hope was crushed.

 

Then the redeeming part of the story!!  Do you see what happened?!  This orphan literally and physically cried out in distress . . .

 

. . . AND GOD HEARD!!

 

He stirred her family to move!  Here is our gorgeous girl:

Our list of potential names has stayed pretty steady over the years of adding children, but a new name came across Jon's mind:  Samantha.  When we looked up its' meaning, it was perfect.  Samantha means "God heard"!!!  She is our Samantha Hope.  Sweet child, you have always been His wanted child, and now you will be ours. 

Design #2 is one that we created for my niece's adoption, but we like it so much we decided to offer it for ours as well.  This design was stirred by our passion that every child matters, and adoption is a love language that goes beyond borders, race, and special needs.  "Adoption Means Love in Any Language" is available in blue OR black, sizes youth XS, small, medium, large, and Adult Small - XXXL! 

 Our plan is to take orders through January 21st, 2015, with the hopes of receiving them and mailing them out the first week of February. 

GREAT Valentine gifts for someone with a heart for children! 

*Suggested donation for either design is $15, plus $2 if you need it shipped.  Yes, this shirt is to help us raise funds to bring Samantha home, but it is also a message.  If you want to help spread this message, but $15 is more than you can afford, we will gladly and happily accept $5 (our cost) so that you can bring awareness to the plight of children in need of families everywhere!  Paypal is hudsonhome@bellsouth.net.  Please include any shipping address or instructions.  Sizes Youth Small, Medium, & Large.  Adult Small through XXXL.

NOTE:  "Jesus Hears the Orphan" is not available in youth XS.



 

Christmas Lights Scavenger Hunt

Saturday, December 13th, meet at Macedonia Baptist Church in Owensboro, Kentucky at 4:30 p.m.

Teams should consist of two to three adults, and children are more than welcome! (Just make sure your team fits in one car.)  Partner up with a buddy and bring a pen, a car, a camera or phone to take pictures, and an adoption donation (suggested $10/team). You'll have a list of Christmas lights to find and photograph, and race back to the finish line to win - while obeying traffic laws, of course!! Prize for first place! Email us with any questions. 

 

UPDATE:  Three amazing teams had a blast in the hunt!  Thank you Casey Crew, Basham Bunch, and Fuqua Family!

Pay With Love

Something we've been working on since 2012. Besides the fun memories, there is an important message at about 2:48. If the storyline doesn't make sense, read the full description under the video.  :)
http://youtu.be/N4SW5CRrWHQ

Here We GROW Again!

Details.  Everyone wants details about our decision to adopt again.  The problem is I cannot fully recollect how we arrived where we are today!  :)

I remember the beginnings of the surreal conversations initiated by Jon about adopting again.  So odd.  Those talks were completely unexpected.  Neither of us could have fathomed going down this path again, yet amazingly, we both just knew.

Still weary from the last fundraising/paperwork/red tape/emotionally-up-and-down process, there was definitely shock on our part.  But from the beginning of our prayers and thoughts about starting again, there was no doubt this was God's plan.

I vaguely recall computer research and phone calls, determining if we can even qualify this time.  (That is an ongoing prayer request, because we are asking for an exception to the income requirement.)

What I do remember is the moment Jon showed me the faces of two precious sisters in Taiwan.  Two sisters whose faces still bring tears to my eyes and tug at our hearts.  Ultimately, we were not approved to adopt them due to the number of children we already have.  So the roller coaster ride of emotions that are inevitable in adoption started immediately.  Despite our brokenness and disappointment in the decision regarding the sisters, we have to trust God has a plan for those girls, and someone is going to respond to His call and bring them home.  *Someone with less than 3 children at home.  You can read more at the bottom of this post.

That hits the main points of the past months.  After continued prayer and discussion, we are moving to adopt again through China's special needs program for a daughter or daughters somewhere in the age range of 6 to 9.  As we did with each previous adoption, we explored all the options available, including the foster care system and other countries.  Only God knows the exact reasoning, but He has placed a burden on our hearts for children in orphanages. 

This whole thing is crazy . . . yet it isn't.  The daunting task of paperwork and fundraising make me want to puke.  Seriously.  It's scary in a hundred different ways, but we're okay with that.  Here we grow again!!


*The orphanage assigned to find their family prefers adoptive families with no more than 3 children at home.  They claim they will allow exceptions in the case of older children or sibling adoptions, and these girls are both at almost 8 and 9 years old.  A few large families before us had been turned down, but we did not let that waiver our commitment.  There was a great flurry of effort on our part to adopt these girls.  It took a while, but we found an agency who worked with us to implore the Taiwanese orphanage to allow our family an exception. At the point where at least three families before us were turned down, we kept fighting.  Long story short, the orphanage said "no".  This from the orphanage who has these girls in two separate foster homes, one with 8 total people living in the home and the other with 7.  This from the orphanage who sent these girls for a 2-week visit to America through a hosting program to advocate for their adoption, and placed them with a family larger than our own.  The host family has at least three children/grandchildren who are almost the same ages as three of ours, and the girls THRIVED!!  Please pray for these sweethearts.  If you would like information on the beautiful Taiwanese sisters who need their forever family, PLEASE contact me!! 

My Humble Opinion on Fundraising for Adoption

You have to be rich to adopt.
 
During our first adoption process, that is the firm opinion I formed.  Down in the trenches, working to raise thousands of dollars, I would look at families who had adopted more than once and I just could not figure it out.  They had to be rich.
 
Fast-forward to the present, where we have added a second and third child to our family through adoption.  I now realize the error of my early thoughts.  Yes, adoption is expensive whether you pursue the domestic or international route.  No, you do not have to be rich.  Our family is living proof that finances are just an excuse.
 
Our Bible has commanded us to care for orphans.  For those who are eligible to adopt, the financial requirement can be astounding.  I assume that most families do not have that amount of money sitting around.  While I am a HUGE proponent of saving for the things you need/want, adoption is different.  When you make the decision to follow God's call to adopt, there is no time to waste. 
 

Millions of children sit and wait. 

 

Do we let them sit on, growing older and therefore considered less "adoptable" while we try to save for the process?  No!  We jump to action, humbling ourselves to admit we need help, and allowing others in our lives and communities to participate in the calling to care for the fatherless.  After all, not everyone can qualify to adopt with all the requirements for age/medical history/marital life/etc.  If you are ineligible to adopt, should you sit idly by and ignore the orphan crisis?  No!  You find opportunities to help families with the ridiculous costs for the most un-ridiculous of events - giving a child the family they deserve!

 

Some go so far to say that if you were pregnant, you wouldn't be going around asking for money to help with your impending delivery expenses.  No you wouldn't, but having a baby (with or without insurance), and adopting without any support are two entirely different things.  If you are about to give birth and go to a hospital, they won't demand all the money BEFORE you can have the baby.  As you check into the ER, the receptionist will not say, "Either pay up front or hold that baby in!"  LOL!  Once the baby is born, there is no problem taking the baby home, even if you have not cleared your account.  And payments can be arranged! 

 

In adoption, you have to pay the fees as you go.  If you do not have the funds, you either wait until you do (causing additional fees down the road if some of your documents go beyond time restrictions), or if you have been matched, risk losing your child!  Can you imagine giving birth in the hospital and preparing to leave with your bundle of joy, only to find that if you cannot pay your hospital bill in its entirety they will take the child from you until someone else comes along to pay the expenses!?!!

 

As an adoptive family, where are you left if you do not have thousands sitting in the bank? 

  1) Grant applications.  The one drawback to those is the uncertainty.  Many families apply, and funds are limited. 

  2) Jobs.  As we brainstormed possibilities to finance our recent adoptions, we contemplated putting our children in public school and finding a full-time job for me.  Besides denying a calling in my life (homeschooling), it was a pretty fruitless idea.  Even with my Bachelor's Degree, the likelihood of finding a position, paying gas and childcare expenses, and being able to earn what we needed for the adoption was slim.  I was, however, able to take on three part-time jobs devoted entirely to adoption expenses.

  3) Sell stuff.  When you are desperately trying to bring a new little life home, you find so much of what used to be important is no longer desired. 

  4) Loans.  There are interest-free and low-interest loans available for adoption. 

  5) Adoption Tax Credit.  I used to believe families should take the tax credit into consideration when raising funds, basically subtracting it from their total estimated expenses.  As the tax credit is now administered, however, that is a risky gamble for families to take.  It's based upon your tax liability.  In our case, our income for the year is so low that the taxes we owe are very minimal.  We will not be able to receive the full amount of the adoption tax credit.  Thankfully it can reduce your tax liability over a period of 6 years, so our hope is that it will be enough to pay back our two adoption loans.

  6) Fundraise.  Find services or products you can offer/make.  Utilize fundraisers at local businesses and restaurants.  This is an opportunity to engage others, giving them a chance to do something, too!  God is right there with you, calling others to help in specific ways.  Ask for the help you need.  Relinquish the "control" you try to have over the situation.  It's hard, it can be embarrassing, and boy is it humbling.  It shouts to the world that you, by yourself, are unable to accomplish this task the Lord has given you.  It takes any glory and puts it in its proper place - at the feet of our God who deserves it all. 
 

Two points of advice I have when fundraising.  First, don't rely on human beings.  You definitely set yourself up for disappointment if you rely on certain people to be supportive of your efforts.  Even if you have been supportive to their cause in the past, it does not mean they will be there for you.  Again, this is God's plan, not yours, and He will provide through those who are part of it.  Second, stop worrying.  If you are feeling like everyone cringes at the thought of another fundraiser from you and your family, take heart and realize others have more compassion than you may give them credit.  Friends and family know that no one expects them to participate in every single fundraiser.  Trust me, you learn to trust God more than ever through this refining process.  And truly if someone is annoyed by your fundraising efforts, I suggest it's likely God is working something in their lives.  Just let them un-follow your facebook newsfeed, and pray for them. :) 

 

For what it's worth, that's my opinion!

 
 
* I realize the majority of friends and families are comfortable and supportive of efforts in the adoption process.  I started this entry as my sister-in-law came across yet another discouraging blog refuting fundraising.  There are an abundance of blogs with negative opinions regarding fundraising for adoption, so I wanted to put another source of encouragement out there for families in the adoption process who have to fundraise.  There is compassion for you in this journey.  At the end of the day, each family has different life circumstances over which to pray and decide what the right path is for them.  Ignore the critics as best you can, and trust in Gods plan!